I need to do SOMETHING. Anything! Some kind of exercise to lose some weight. I’ll talk about it in more detail in another blog, but I need to lose some weight.
With so little time with Raife and Emma as it is, I didn’t really want to do something that would take away too much of my time with them. So I want to exercise and lose weight, but not lose time with my wife and son. Great one, Jon. Don’t want much, do you?
I suggested yoga to Emma. We could do it together, at home, after Raife went to sleep, it’s free, wouldn’t take too long. Looked at the benefits. Looks great!
My only experience with yoga is messing about and being very competitive on Wii Fit with family. Not exactly the mindful, relaxing zen you associate with yoga. With Raife soundly off to sleep, Emma’s blog written and published, it was time to try it out…
So here we go, my thoughts as we tried yoga for the first time last night:
*Searches yoga on YouTube* Yoga with Adriene is the main YouTube channel for yoga, I take it?
*Looking through the suggested videos* Yeah, I can definitely do some of those poses…
I used to be able to do that (see right)!! I wonder if I still can? Emma isn’t far away from doing it.
No. No. I can’t. Definitely not. Ow! Ooh that hurts. Ow! Why? Why did I do that? I actually need to take a minute.
Ahh, phew – Yoga for Complete Beginners – 20 Minute Home Yoga Workout! – sounds perfect!
Let’s get our zen on.
Adriene is chill as hell…(but not in that super annoying, over the top, way)
Okay, sitting with legs crossed first. You kidding me? I’ve been doing this since nursery. I got this.
Two minutes in and this has already emphasised how bad my posture is. I’m 6ft 4″ and overweight. IT’S SO BAD!
If this does nothing but help my posture, I’ll be happy.
“We come to the mat to have an experience.” – this is some serious soulful sh*t.
I’m thinking about this way too much. Maybe because I’m going to write a blog about it. Definitely trying to think about what everything feels like. Must be all zen-like. Feels mostly very stretchy, by the way.
“Head over heart, heart over pelvis” – this seems very important. Also, apparently, people who do yoga are called “yogis”. Am I a yogi, now?
This is about the most un-Dad thing I’ve done since becoming a Dad.
All fours now. This is about as adventurous we’re going to get, right?
Go away, dog. No, get, get, out…get out of the way…move… Sherlock, out of the way!
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KEEP MY NECK RELAXED?! I NEED TO WATCH WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND I NEED TO MOVE MY NECK TO DO THAT!
Man, my arse is in the air right now. If someone came in, all they’d see is my backside (disclaimer: I am clothed and no builders’ bum is on show).
This actually feels pretty good. I think I’m starting to get the balance of how far to stretch.
I was wrong. I was so wrong! All fours is not as adventurous as we’re going to get. Is this really happening? Okay, okay. It is. We’re doing ‘downward dog’ on our first go. I say ‘doing’, I’m probably butchering any aesthetic or artistic element that comes with yoga, but hey! I feel like I’m doing a decent job…
The hamstrings, my poor hamstrings.
‘Warrior’ pose. I’m down with this. Time to spread those legs wiiiide!
I just caught myself in the mirror. It looks like my stomach is about 3m in front of the rest of my body. A tear rolls down my cheek (not really, call it ‘dramatic effect’).
*Ignores the mirror* Yeeeeeeeeeeeah, warrior pose!! Feel the streeeeeeeeetch. Bossing it.
*Looking across the room to my wife* Yep, she’s not enjoying it.
*After a few more gentle, breathy, stretchy type things* We’re done. That actually went pretty quickly.
Wife confirms it. “It’s not for me”. Like the lemon hot cross bun I bought her last week, that went down like a lead balloon.
*Overthinking how I feel* I enjoyed it. 100%. I guess I’m feeling a bit more chilled out. I can feel something in my back, shoulders and neck, like when you leave the gym after a good workout but not as intense.
I’m a tiny bit sweaty. Was it more strenuous than I realised? Or is it just a bit warm in here?
Well, that’s that. Time for a beer!
It’s about an hour later, and I’m actually writing this blog now. I can feel the cricks in my back, shoulders and neck. Hopefully, that’s a good thing?
I think my heart rate is slower than it normally would be. *Checks Fitbit* My heart rate is slower than it normally would be. I’m not exactly a pillar of inner tranquillity and mindfulness, but I am feeling more relaxed.
I’ll definitely do it again. Probably not with the wife…
I wonder if anyone will count how many thoughts there are, just to check? (This counts as a thought…)